"Frying Bacon in the Nude"

We are often very hard on ourselves, harder than we might even be on other people. Most of us don't treat strangers the way we treat ourselves: "I'm so stupid", "I'm not a lucky person", and “I’m too fat/skinny". Why do we say these things?

Basically low self-esteem or a pattern of putting ourselves down, but more often than not it’s when we've done something which we wish we hadn't … like FRYING BACON IN THE NUDE! This story comes from a question asked by an innocent, cute and very adorable three-year-old boy, who just happened to be enjoying a weekend at a nudist camp along with his mother and grandparents. “Mommy? Everyone is naked. Why does she (referring to the lady cooking breakfast) have on an apron?” “Because, Terry, you don’t fry bacon in the nude!” Such a wise woman, my mother.

We all know that bacon grease splatters all over the place when you're frying it on the stove. But in the heat of the moment, the warmth of the summer morning or the desire to let go of all confinement, you just might find yourself faced with the opportunity of cooking “au natural" so to speak. So away we go, flying around kitchen like crazy, and the bacon begins to get hot. The grease splatters start and we begin to realize that we just didn’t think this through as well as we might have done. Now we’re faced with standing back as far as possible to turn the bacon strips, reach tentatively for the stove control knob, consider running for the robe or apron we COULD have put on in the first place, risk having the bacon burn (causing the fire department approved smoke alarm to start blaring, which in turn freaks the cats and attracts exactly the neighbors you don't want to see us right now), and when it's all over, we ask, "What in the world was I thinking when I thought I could do this in the first place?!?”

Now, perhaps you’ve not had this experience, but perhaps you've had these feelings. There's all kinds of things we try to do that we wish we never tried, but we certainly don't share these faux pas with others … except, of course me, since I’ve devoted my life to shouting my foibles from the rooftops with the hope that I can help others avoid the mistakes I’ve made, provided doing so is for their higher good. Here are some others:

· Too tired or rushed to stop for gas, so we try to get there on fumes.

· The covers and sheets are all which away on the bed, it would be logical to get up, remake the bed, enjoy a peaceful nights rest, but struggle all night with them, or attempt to remake the bed while we're lying down.

· We know what time we have to leave to get to work on time, but keep hitting the snooze button, get up late, and then try to figure out some kind of believable excuse.

You get the idea – and we'll try these stunts again. Why? It’s not just lack of self-esteem, or lack of planning. Part of the problem is our reluctance to change. Like the alcoholic’s definition of insanity, “Doing the same thing over and expecting a different result.” It’s not going to happen. But our unwillingness to alter our path goes deeper. I will talk more about that in the next installment – look for it in about ten days!

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Dr. Terry