Huh?

My body decided I needed to rest two weeks ago and I was in bed with the flu for the good part of a day. Apparently I didn’t bother listening to my body because I spent another day this week in bed with bronchitis due to fatigue. With all I have to do this week for the holidays I was lying there thinking, “WTF?!?”

Now, before you start hyperventilating, you DO know what that means in the metaphysical world in which I live, don’t you? Actually, it has two meanings, neither of which you are probably thinking about right now.

Whenever we are faced with a challenge the first meaning can translate to, “What’s The Fear?” What fear-based thoughts or lack consciousness makes us think we have to buy into stinking thinking in our life? What fear has caused us to become unbalanced and seemingly unaware of the Divine Nature within?

The second, equally impactful meaning begs yet another question:  “Where’s The Faith?” If we truly believe we are one with the Universe and that the power of God is our power, then how do we get ourselves into sticky situations?

It’s not easy living in a state of being with everyone around you when the jerk coming toward you in the shopping center parking lot slips into the place for which you were waiting. Nor is it easy to experience physical problems. But here’s the good news about any problem, physical or otherwise.

While we’re in these human forms pain is a given. Without the warning system of pain we’d easily cut off our fingers or burn ourselves on the stove. Suffering, however, is optional, even though some of us at times seem to be making a career of it. We must learn from the pain to avoid it in the future. That means getting sick and tired of being sick and tired.

Whatever is bugging you about your life this week try considering one of the “WTF” meanings above and see how your attitude about the situation transforms. It may take some work. It may mean you have to change your attitude. But at least you’ll have the satisfaction of knowing that you’re in control of your life and emotions.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Who Decides For You?

Have you ever thought about how many issues, events, problems – even wars! – are created for us by others? In the past week we’ve had Grey Thursday, Black Friday and Cyber Monday. The results of these made-up days of shopping will be analyzed, scrutinized and victimized as the news media, Wall Street and politicians decide the happiness and security of the next month – or perhaps the coming year! – based on how much we spent.

Seriously? Do you realize that there have been people who have lived virtually unscathed through the “Great Recession” we’re coming out of right now? While there were people committing suicide in 1929 many others made their fortunes in the Great Depression. How?

They practiced what many of us already know is possible:  Change your thinking – Change your life! We have choice. We are not mindless automatons. We are creatures of free will who are not bound by instincts. Unlike geese we can choose to fly south for the winter or we can choose to stay in the north and bundle up.

I grew up as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Members of that religion do not enlist in the military or fight in wars. A woman once angrily asked my mother what the world would be like if everyone was like that. I remember my mom smiling back at the woman without saying anything. Why? Because if everyone – literally everyone – refused to fight we’d have peace on earth.

There would be no people in Bangladesh dying in a factory fire while they were sewing clothes for Wal-Mart, Tommy Hilfiger and The Gap at twenty cents an hour. We’d have love in families. We’d have different religions and faiths and cultures enjoying diversity and richness. There would be no hunger, for we would care for one another. There would be no loneliness, because everyone would be loved.

Does world peace sound too good to be true? I still think that it’s good enough to be true, and we can have it now if as a species we decide to have it. We can choose to be bogged down in the strife of the world and the economic reports, or we can choose to live in a way that supports each other and the planet.

We are children of the Universe, abundantly supplied and magnificently blessed with the power to affect change in our lives, which in turns helps everyone around us. We have the power – you and I. Decide to use your power for good for yourself and others today. It beats having to turn on the news or get an alert on your smart phone to inform you how your life will turn out.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Happy Thanksgiving

Another holiday is upon us when society expects we will act a certain way and experience an approved of emotional response. In a world where everyone is a unique expression of God this expectation is a recipe for disappointment.

None of us experience events exactly the same way. That statement is a given for any of us sharing a Thanksgiving feast with family we’ve not seen in a while. What looks like a wonderful afternoon to us might be a chore to endure for others.

I sincerely hope that with whomever you spend today it is with those who love you as much as you love them. Even if you’re alone you might take time to enjoy the freedom of doing exactly what you want.

The most current unrest in the Middle East or the various news reports on TV can lead one to believe there is nothing about which to be thankful. That would be wrong. Whether you are alone, with a partner or with a large group, please take time to appreciate the good in your life. Be willing to have more of joy and love in the days and months to come.

We are living in one of the most exciting times in the history of humankind. Open to the blessings that are yours to enjoy and share. May you and your loved ones have a joyous and loving Thanksgiving weekend!

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Are You Temporarily Unavailable?

I tried to sign into my Facebook account just now and received the response:

Account Temporarily Unavailable

Your account is currently unavailable due to a site issue.

We expect this to be resolved shortly. Please try again in a few minutes.

I thought to myself how very appropriate that my Facebook account is reflecting my mood. We know metaphysically that our outer experience reflects our innermost thoughts. After an incredibly high experience on Sunday I found myself on Monday feeling like I just didn’t want to climb the next mountain ahead.

Unpack the supplies. Send the Sherpas home. Crawl back in bed and don’t even pet the cats. Pathetic, yet true. This “account” was temporarily unavailable due to a personal site crash.

Part of acknowledging our mission in life as we work toward our vision is recognizing our need to rest and regenerate. We don’t expect to drive our car for weeks without putting gas in the tank. Well, my husband, Paul, does. He owns a Prius, but that’s not the point. We can so easily become caught up in projects, responsibility and life in general that we forget to eat (or eat junk because it’s quick), work late into the evening or refuse to step away from the computer to just relax.

My Facebook account is up and running again. I assume it’s because the Facebook technical staff scurried about tweaking what needed attention. Whatever they did it worked.

I’m up and running again as well. Fortunately, I have a team of specialists (my prayer partner, my ministerial mentor, my new massage trade partner and my chiropractor) who each found a component in my life that needed re-calibrating, replacing or repairing.

What’s out of synch in your psyche today? What’s the one thing you could change about your thinking that would make all the difference in the world in how you are viewing your life today? You’ll only find out if you stop the craziness and jealously take a few minutes or more for yourself. If that feels selfish understand this:  If you continue down a path of non-stop service or work for everyone else to your own determent you will soon not be any good to anyone, including yourself.

This “account” is now, once again, completely available.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

You Know, You Should...

I did something at church last Sunday that I rarely do. I told the members at Unity that they should do something. I don’t like to be “should” on so, therefore, I do my very best not to “should” on others.

Still, I told them they should be at the membership meeting this month. Membership means something to me and part of what it means is participation. It’s an important meeting so, yes, members should be there. This makes better sense: Granted, if everyone felt as passionate about membership to organizations as I feel, I wouldn’t have to mention it in the first place, but that’s another topic for later.

I bring up “shoulding” (again!) because perhaps you’ve noticed how some people will often compliment you on an accomplishment and then, without even taking a breath, proceed to tell you how you “should” have done it. I find that amazing, almost entertaining, most of the time and downright annoying the rest of the time.

One of the most difficult things to experience is criticism from others, even if those attacks are couched in a compliment. It is at these times that we must dodge and deflect. If we allow others to throw us off balance we can lose sight of our own vision and our goals.

What dodging and defecting unnecessary criticism can do is strengthen our resolve and shore up the core foundations of our beliefs. If we are not careful we can get caught up in the negative attacks. We often find such attacks are based on the person’s own insecurities or feelings of inadequacy.

In the midst of that, however, is the infuriating fact that regardless of the person’s intent (conscious or subconscious), the poor “shoulder” might just have an idea we ought to consider. Like I said, it’s somewhat infuriating. It’s a lot like your ex or your mother-in-law calling you on your stuff. You get the picture and it’s not pretty.

It is an issue of balance. If we can hear criticism constructively and objectively we will become more confident and often find some fine tuning of our actions that we can do to accelerate the progression toward our goals. After a while we’ll be able to hear the words, pick what we can use and cast away the rest. Now that’s power.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

After the Storm

The very fact that I can write my blog this week, send it off to my volunteer proofreader/editor and then out to all of you is evidence that Hurricane Sandy did not have the effect on our area as predicted. We prepared for the worst, probably not as well as we could have, but we took precautions. We had a few leaks in the roof that we’ll address soon, and I got to use the shop vac in the cellar more than once. But other than the fact that our satellite lost the HD channels and we had to analog (gasp!), that was about the extent of our hardships. Not even a gap in electric service during the whole thing.

How drastically different than our friends and neighbors less than an hour away! The pictures of the east coast are devastating and those we’ve heard from who are inland, but closer to the Atlantic than we, are still without power in many cases, if they even have a home in which to have power. So many must rebuild and regroup, and our thoughts and prayers go out to them.

Humans seem to like to mark events – birthdays, anniversaries and the beginning of the New Year to name a few. Tonight is Halloween, the scariest night of the year for the kids. October 31^st is also the pagan holiday of Samhain. It marks the end the year on the calendar of the Old Religion and the beginning of a new cycle. It is the perfect time for us to let go of the past, in particular the past few days, and move forward into the future.

We don’t need disasters to help us get rid of things or special days to force us to appreciate our blessings. We can start every day of our lives with thanks for a new day, knowing that it will be the best ever. We can go through the day expressing our love for God and our planet by taking care of one another and the Earth.  Every night before we close our eyes we can let go of the hurts of the day, forgive ourselves and others, and give thanks once more for the love in our life.

Sounds like too much “pink-cloud metaphysics?” Sounds too good to be true? I hope not. It sure beats being Eeyore, running around with our tail falling off. Our lives are going to be what we make of them. Believe that or not. I choose to believe it. I choose to believe that all the wonderful things I expect to happen are “good enough to be true.” Join me.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Empowered Forgiveness

Forgive me for no blog or message last week, but with the Unity of Harrisburg 30^th Anniversary it was one of several things that just didn’t get done. Then this week catch up was more than I expected. Knowing, however, that everything before “but” is B.S., let me just leave it at “I’m sorry” with no further explanation!

Last week, Daily Om (http://dailyom.com) published the thoughts of Madisyn Taylor. Taylor brings up a very interesting angle on accepting an apology from someone:  More often than not we say, “It’s alright,” or “It’s okay,” and by saying this we are allowing, accepting, and giving permission for the behavior to happen again. When we say “thank you” or “I accept your apology,” we are forced to sit in our feelings rather than ignore them.

Many of us, females particularly, have been told to put up and shut up throughout our lives. If our sexual orientation, skin color or cultural background is different than the norm in which we live just surviving can be a struggle. We can become less interested in being fully-expressed and more satisfied with not having conflict.

This ingrained belief system then shows up when someone says, “I’m sorry.” We can feel like we didn’t have the right to be hurt or upset. Yes, I know all the metaphysical psychobabble about how we partnered with the other person to create the situation and blaah, blaah, blaah. We have the right to expect integrity from others and the right to make decisions so that unpleasant situations do not repeat. Being kind does not require us to become a spiritual doormat.

Accepting an apology with grace puts “an end to this karmic chain,” according to Taylor. It allows us to acknowledge to the other person that we truly forgive them and at the same time recognizing the emotions we may have covered up because of what happened.

The next time someone apologies to you, be aware of how you respond. As Taylor says, “…often a simple ‘thank you’ is enough.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

We Are One

One of the foundation principles I teach is the oneness of all creation. Political commentary, particularly during a presidential election year, seems to be the opposite of that concept. In the midst of close political races some religions are crossing the line between church and state. This action perpetuates rifts between spiritual communities.

I recently read the following poem in an email from Rev. Dr. Peggy Price, which I feel puts the current situation into perspective:

The moment you stand up and claim your divinity,

Christ is reborn within your heart,

Buddha rejoices,

Mohammed dances upon the mountaintop,

Lao Tzu winks approvingly

And the Promise of the Tree of Life is Fulfilled.

The “our way is THE way” cry will continue to divide the human race, making planetary unification impossible. Acceptance of the ways and rights of others does not need to be approval. Acceptance does, however, mean living among one another with respect, honor and love. Those principles are central to all major religions and spiritual paths, yet we are seeing less and less evidence of such in the news media.

When we recognize our own Divinity and refuse to blame anyone for our circumstances we move closer to seeing the Divinity in others. In a society that demands accountability perhaps we might each take more personal responsibility in our own lives and happiness, and release the need to worry about what entitlements are being protested about from others.

I am proud to be a member of two major spiritual communities, both of which teach a philosophy of life applicable to people of all faiths and religions. I am equally proud that we do not require adherence to our beliefs to benefit from the teachings in which we believe. Our way is our way, it is a way, but it is not the way.

Be kind this week to everyone with whom you come in contact. Perhaps the person’s belief that is most diametrically opposed to ours is the one from which we can reap the most lasting benefit, if only we are willing to open our minds to the possibility of acceptance and unity.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Fall

According to the Gregorian calendar we’ve only been experiencing fall here in the northern hemisphere for less than two weeks – since the autumnal equinox on September 22. Did the cooler weather and changing leaves sneak up on you again?

Perhaps that’s because Mother Earth has had this all in preparation since about August 1. There’s a Celtic celebration at that time (one of the names is Lammas) that is the start of the autumn season. So rather than abruptly downshifting from summer to fall on September 22, Mother has been gearing up for the changes for about six weeks.

We can easily be caught off guard by ignoring the signs all around us. The days didn’t suddenly turn cooler on September 22; there’s been a slight trending in that direction. All the leaves didn’t just begin to lose their leaves; some started over a month ago.

We’ve been noticing the small outdoor residents (rabbits, squirrels and chipmunks) on our farmette stashing away goodies for the winter or for when they come out of hibernation in the spring. Logistically I haven’t a clue where the spring flowers will show up since the squirrels are re-decorating the gardens. Instinctually, however, they are planning ahead.

That’s not always something we humans are so stellar about doing. We notice a pound or two, but still go for the extra scoop of ice cream. We stay silent when someone with whom we work discriminates against another or tells an off-color joke, yet decry the atrocities of Darfur as being so terrible. We wish so-and-so would do such-and-such, but while we’re judging others find we are oblivious to our own character defects.

So it seems the gist of this week’s blog is about awareness and taking action to better our lives. If we are living mindful lives we will take time to be consciously aware of our surroundings – not seeing what we want to see, but what truly is. Then we can take the next step to changing what we feel we want to change.

Enjoy the cooler weather of fall if you are in our neck of the woods. Remembering that since the Celtic season of autumn began August 1 that puts the beginning of winter (or Yule) on November 1. Your holiday shopping is done, right?

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

"You Really Should..."

Actually, by the time you get through reading the blog this week I hope you’ll see “you really shouldn’t!” I’m not one to “should” (ahem) on others. I can tell you without reservation that I’m re-discovering enough of my own character defects through a year-long course I’m taking that I really don’t have time to worry about what you should be doing, fixing, stopping or starting.

It is usually with good intentions when someone tells us we should be doing this or that. We often feel such compassion when we see others struggling, particularly if the situation is similar or seemingly identical to something we’ve worked through in the past. We may decide the solution that worked for us is a ready-made template which our friend should use to solve his or her dilemma.

That’s not a great idea. First of all, a little struggle can be a good thing because we are rewarded with great satisfaction when we solve the problem or work through the situation. Second, no situation is identical, so what worked for us may not be applicable at all to them. As loving supporters we can be there to coach our friends along as they work through their own issues. Asking how we can support a friend is usually more effective than offering an unsolicited litany of suggestions of what they should be doing.

It’s so much easier to see the solution to someone else’s problems, is it not? Yet, our superficial assessment of their situation may not take into consideration all the events and actions that led up to the current problem. It also brings to mind the scripture that suggests we take the rafter out of our own eye before extracting the splinter from our brother or sister.

The next time you’re tempted to tell someone what they should or shouldn’t be doing, be willing to stop, take a breath and know the Truth about them. That Truth is that they are Divine Spirit in human form, infinitely capable of changing whatever their consciousness got them into. Then ask how you can support them with compassion and empathy.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

How Do You Call It?

Many people are amazed at the twist, spin and interpretation of recent events impacting the upcoming presidential elections here in the States. The media claims to report the facts, but often the stories are slanted at best and biased at worst.

Political campaigns are a wonderful example of how we form new ideas or hold onto old beliefs in spite of the evidence. People want to believe the good reports about their favorite candidate, but disregard the negative stories as campaign politics. How is that the same in our daily lives?

The Principles of New Thought teach us to decide how we want to experience life. We can allow our past belief system to stop us or we can chart a new course based on what works for us. Sports analogies are not my strong suit, but I found a story recently that speaks to this.

A young umpire was calling his first game and proudly told another umpire, “I call it as it is.” A more experienced umpire chuckled and said, “I call it as I see it.” The oldest, most senior of the umpires was walking by, stopped and looked at them shaking his head. He said, “You both got it wrong. It ain’t nuthin’ till I call it.”

Are you getting the flu, or did you just enjoy a good sneeze? Have you been devastated financially or has the stock market just dipped? Does your spouse no longer love you because s/he forgot to get you a card on a special day?

No one gets to “call it” for us. We have that privilege, but it comes with responsibility. For how we call it determines what we experience. Choose wisely!

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Do Your Best

I often say in guided meditations that no matter what the situation may look like at the time, everyone was doing the best they could with what they had to work with. We can certainly “Monday Morning Quarterback” any situation, but what’s the point?

Reviewing past situations with the intention to do even better next time, or to avoid the same pitfalls, is exercising wisdom. If, however, our intention is to bitch about what “they” should have or could have done, particularly when we chose not to be part of the process, then there’s really no point in regurgitating the episode. Who needs the drama?

I was criticized today for not supporting something I made clear some time ago I would not be able to fully support. I asked the person, “So basically you feel I failed you when I told you I wouldn’t be able to support you and then didn’t?” Seriously? I get that the person needed a lot more help than was available and in spite of it did an amazing job. I also get that I can only do as much as I’m capable of doing, even if someone thought I should be doing more than was possible.

Of course, this means I disappointed someone. I hate that. You can’t be a successful leader and expect to please everyone – it ain’t happening. If you’re in a leadership position trying to do that I strongly suggest you reconsider your career choice.

But to say I wasn’t pained by the disappointment I heard today would be untrue. I was pained quite deeply because I work so hard to make sure that everyone in my life is supported. Then I remembered that I did exactly what I said I would do. That’s integrity. It may not be what was desired of me, but I followed through, even if that follow through was less than was desired by others.

I’m blogging about this because if I’m upset by this after all the spiritual and inner work I’ve done over the past 25 year plus then perhaps you can see something in your life to which you can relate. We aren’t here to please each other. Don’t get me wrong – I don’t go out of my way to tick people off. But if we are going to live authentic lives then someone is going to be upset with us because we aren’t playing by their rules.

Today was my day to disappoint someone. I feel that person’s pain. I also know that we’ll both live. As my friend, Peggy, says, “It’s just one piddily-ass day. Get over it.”

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Transitions

Last weekend I attended the funeral of a colleague, Sandy Chappell. While I believe that Life is eternal, our existence on this plane as spirits having a human experience is limited.

In Sandy’s case, her years were far too limited for my liking and the liking of her many other fellow flight attendants, pilots, family and friends who attended the services. The fact that she was three months my junior was a jolt to my otherwise confident assumption about my own life expectancy.

I flew with Sandy many times over the past seven years that we were at the DC base. I did not know her well, but she appeared to have lived life fully and without regret. At least that’s what I’m choosing to believe. She was authentic, always smartly outfitted in her original flight attendant hat (no longer an approved uniform piece, but I never knew of anyone challenging her on that!) and, of course, her signature bubble gum pink lipstick. If there was a difficult passenger on board I always knew she could turn the customer around.

I want to be more like she was - sans the lipstick, not my shade – and simply be me. My friend, Arleen, lives by the adage “I neither defend, justify nor explain my actions. I let the results speak for themselves.” I never shared that with Sandy. I believe if I had she would have looked at me with a blank stare on her face as if to say, “Yeah…and?”

Be willing this week to pick up the phone or send a card (you know, the paper kind that requires a stamp) to someone you love. Let them know the difference they’ve made in your life. The Centers for Spiritual Living ministers on our listserv have been doing that this week with an amazing outflow of love and appreciation for those who mentor us in life.

It’s just life. We all have mostly  the same issues. Let’s all help one another to enjoy it to the best of our ability. I think Sandy would have liked that idea. Safe flights now and forever, Sandy.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Take Just a Moment

I stopped at the post office one day last week for some stamps on my way into my office at Unity of Harrisburg. I asked if there were any “Love” stamps and the clerk quickly got them out of his drawer for me. “These are the only kind of stamps we should be selling,” he said. “With all the awful things going on in the world,” he continued, “we need more love.”

I suggested to him that if we look in the right places we can find so much good in the world and in our community. Though, I admitted to him, it’s not usually found on the news. When he complained that there wasn’t anywhere locally that was positive, I smiled and gave him my business card from Unity. “You’ll find it here,” I said, “every Sunday at 10:00am and we’re just down the street!”

He laughed and said he should have known he was talking to a pastor. I didn’t see him on Sunday, but it got me to thinking just how easy it is to show someone who is obviously in distress that there is an alternative. I also realized that my attitude shifted as well, leaving the post office feeling deeply grateful that I have a people in my life who are willing to do something about their lives instead of buying into the “stinkin’ thinkin’” with which we can come into contact on a daily basis.

At the bottom of this blog you’ll see a link. It’s to a “TED talk”. If you’re not familiar with TED (technology, entertainment and design), it’s worth a look. It’s a stellar example of how many people in the world are making a difference. This particular link is one that will take you about ten minutes to watch. I encourage you to do so. Besides being an amazing visual treat, I found it to be centering and uplifting.

At least I did the second time I watched it. The first time I brought it up on my laptop, listening to it, glancing occasionally at the images, while I caught up on email on my desktop and programming my new mobile device. MADNESS!

Take just a moment today. Stop what you are doing and look around at the world around you. Nothing in your sightline will ever be the same. Do you really want to miss that? Being in the moment and being mindful of our surroundings allows Spirit to revive us. In that flow of Divine Love all is possible.

Here’s the link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=gXDMoiEkyuQ&vq=medium

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Stop the World!

For some reason the name of a play from the early 1960s, Stop the World – I Want to Get Off has been running through my mind. A quick look at my Google calendar would explain that reason. Are you feeling a little over-scheduled and hectic lately?

I hope not. My prayer for you is that you are enjoying life to the fullest and surrounded by like-minded, loving individuals. Then again, I am experiencing that and I still feel stressed sometimes. Why?

It comes from the fact that even if we are doing what we love to do we can still use a change of pace or a new venue from time-to-time. I’ve heard someone say, “Well at least he died doing what he loved!” Maybe if the guy had taken a break and re-focused his energy once in a while he’d still be doing what he loved instead of being dead.

In a recent email, Rev. Noel McGinnis reminded me of this fact:  We have freedom of choice, but not of consequence. While I truly believe we are Spirit having a human experience I also understand that our bodies were not meant to run non-stop, never resting. Yes, my car can be driven over 300 miles on a tank of gas, but soon after that it will come to a stop if I don’t refill the tank. The same is true for us.

At some point this week … please … stop your world. Take time for yourself. Be selfishly indulgent. Love yourself like you were taking care of the person who holds the biggest place in your heart.

                                                                                       

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Cash, Check or EZPass?

I use the Pennsylvania Turnpike quite a bit. In fact, since I moved back to the eastern part of the United States over ten years ago, I’ve used a number of toll roads, bridges and tunnels regularly. Knowing this would be the case, one of the first things I did when I returned to the East was sign up for the EZPass system.

This “drive through lane” or “whisk through the express” method of paying tolls saves me a tremendous amount of time and money. I don’t have to sit in lines waiting to pay, fumbling for the change or a credit card. I also get a substantial discount by using the system.

What amazes me is the number of people I see in the long lines who choose to continue paying cash or charging their tolls in person. I’m sure many of them pay the tolls as much or more than me, so why would they not make a simple call or go online to secure the account and use EZPass?

I suppose (and now you’ll understand why I’m using this long example) that it’s the very same reason we prefer to complain about our other problems and yet not reach out for prayer support to actually do something to change our situation. It’s the same reason we keep doing the same things over and over again and expect different results.

Those reasons are, (1) our ego, and, (2) a desire to stay stuck. Our ego must be right; it demands it every time. Normally that’s a good thing because our ego is part of the mechanism we have for realizing that the stove is hot and we need to move our hand. It’s just that our ego has a whole lot of pride, an unnecessary need to think that it’s right all the time and a relentless need to be in charge. It’s time to thank your ego for its service, but put it on notice that you – not it – are the one who makes the decisions for your life.

Second, if we are stuck we’re receiving a payoff, meaning in spite of the fact that the situation sucks in some way we’re getting something out of not getting what we want. I know this sounds counterproductive, perhaps even a little cold and unfeeling, but it’s true. There’s a payoff in being a victim because we get sympathy from those clouded enough in their reasoning to actually buy into our nonsense. We also get to stop ourselves from being the true lights we are in the Universe. After all, if we are stuck in the mud it’s pretty darn hard to shine like a star.

Take a moment this week to see if your problems could use an “EZPass” solution. We do not pray “hoping” the prayer will be answered. Rather, we pray because we know the answer is already in the prayer. It’s free. Remember, there’s no roaming charge for God.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

There have been a number of events in my life lately that have given birth to this week’s blog message. I needn’t go into details. Details often cloud the issue, don’t you think? Suffice it to say that I’ve been sufficiently advised by the Universe that we all need to remember this … now!

I can get so very distracted when there’s so much to do. I’m not completely moved into my new office at Unity of Harrisburg, yet my schedule is already full each day with meetings, counseling appointments, visitations and running a corporation with a six-figure budget. I hope this week between writing my talk for Sunday and getting out my weekly message that I’ll manage to get the boxes of books unpacked in my new office!

And that’s my point – it is not easy to write a talk while looking at boxes of books that “should” be put on selves, categorized and alphabetized. But the books are not more important than having a talk for my Mother’s Day service on Sunday. It’s about prioritizing and that means something may not get done.

Don’t sweat the small stuff. The books will get put on the shelves eventually and they are, for now, out of the way. But here’s the Cosmic Giggle when it comes to setting a thing or two aside instead of making oneself crazy attempting to do everything for everyone at once:  When we focus on just one thing and do it well, we end up completing the task in record time. Why?

The longer we keep in mind a positive outcome to our dilemmas the more energy we are focus on accomplishing the task instead of worrying about not getting it done. The reverse is also true, which is why the more anxious we become about what is not yet done the more frantic and scattered we find ourselves.

Consider your projects for today and pick just one upon which to concentrate your efforts. Reap the rewards of accomplishment as you feel satisfied about following through with your plans. Then, put your feet up and relax for a few minutes. You just worked hard and deserve a break!

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Are You Trying Too Hard?

If you are a person who works to be a better person, often through study and personal reflection, you may find there is always something more to do. It can seem like no matter how hard we try we just can’t seem to get our lives to reflect the excellence for which we strive.

Perhaps you are trying too hard. There are just so many hours in a day and so many days in a week. Yet we use our electronic devices to accomplish far more, often simultaneously, than we could possibly do without them. We may use medications to keep us awake or put us to sleep, disregarding our physical need for rest and our attunement to the cycles of life on our planet.

Take a moment to think about what really needs to be done today and what could just as easily wait. Our “to do” lists can roll through our lives like a bulldozer and that is no way to live. Eliminate at least enough from that list today to take a half hour to do nothing, or to do something that will revive, excite and enliven you in a way that you’ve not experienced recently.

That problem, whatever “that” is, will probably not even been a dim memory in a year or five years. Is it really that important now? Life is for living, not struggling. Life is to be enjoyed, not to be endured.

in Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Got Is...

Let me begin with the acknowledgement that you may substitute any other more palatable word for “God” in this discussion. Many people still see God as the old man in the sky who punishes us if we’re bad and blesses us if we’re good (maybe…if He’s feeling so inclined).

In the New Thought Movement we have a very different concept of God as an intelligence with which we have a direct connection. But, if Spirit, Divine Love, Universal Intelligence, or something else works better for you, I ask that, for the purpose of this discussion, you just substitute that term for God.

When we pray affirmatively we acknowledge the unification of ourselves with God. And yet, even that statement is hollow. “With God” still indicates a separation. How can we be “with” something if we are part of it? How can we be “part of it” if there is only One?

BAM! (That’s the sound of the brick wall with which you may have collided after reading the above paragraph. I dearly hope that you have had your morning coffee before reading this, or at least have been awake for a while!) The confusion and disconnect felt when discussing the Oneness of the Universe stems from two basic reasons:  language and perception.

English and most other modern tongues are not languages of inclusion or unification. They are, by the very nature of their structure, a means of communication that exemplifies separation, division and differences. It is not the fault of our languages, for our languages reflect the parameters of our culture. In English we call that frozen white stuff “snow.” One Native Alaskan language has 26 different terms for snow. Why? That area of the world is more affected by snow than other areas.

We talk in metaphysics about the “universality” of God; that God is timeless, endless and infinite. Yet we live in a world of beginnings and endings, and of birth, life and death. We live a linear existence in a holistic universe. The truth is that whenever we finish the sentence, “God is…” with anything we immediately limit God. How can we begin to describe the infinite with words designed to convey the finite? This is a situation in which words alone cannot be the most effective way to communicate. The definition must be felt, internally and personally.

We also describe God as “all-knowing” and “all-powerful.” God is neither. Does that surprise you? You see, if God is all there is then God is not all-knowing; God is Knowledge. God is not all-powerful; God is Power. Re-read this paragraph. Breathe into it. Let it settle into your consciousness and feel your emotions, for words alone cannot effectively conceive this notion.

We must be careful in prayer to acknowledge our unity. But at the same time we would do well to cut ourselves some slack so that we don’t get hung up on worrying about whether or not we are expressing ourselves as universally as we feel we should. You cannot pray the wrong way, though with practice we can make our prayers more effective.

Go with what is in your heart, but at the same time be cognizant of the words you use. What we say is reflective of what we believe. And, what we believe is behind the thoughts we have that result in our experiences.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Not Choosing IS Choosing

(Originally written April 6, 2012, but not published)

I’m a firm believer in blogging when you have something to say. This week I really don’t have a cute story, any deep insights to share or a foible of my own to report for amusement and education. It’s a busy week with extra services for Holy Week, caring for my Dad and living the life I have chosen to live – all good stuff, actually! But a full-out, blog to share – Iit ain’t happening.

We all have choices to make in life. When our lives get overly complicated and we are in the “busy-ness” of life, it can be enticing to “just let things happen.” As I told my Unity congregation last Sunday, “Not choosing IS choosing.” If we decide to live life that way then there is one rule: We don’t get to bitch about the results if we don’t like what shows up.

If you are celebrating Good Friday and Easter, or observing Passover, may your weekend be blessed by renewal, rebirth, resurrection and the joy of spring!

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Consequences

(Originally written March 30, 2012, but not posted)

Whether or not we are aware of it, the Universal Law of Cause and Effect operates at all times in our lives. Our thoughts, both conscious and unconscious, are constantly forming our reality. The results of those thoughts produce what we think are rewards and consequences.

It is our ego that is into judging, not the Universe. We judge some outcomes and situations as rewards, sometimes even miracles. Other results we deem consequences or occasionally disasters.

It is easiest to understand this concept when we have created and achieved a goal, or when we have planned some event and it falls apart. We see these situations as achievements (rewards) or failures (consequences). Then we get caught up in what other people are saying. It is fascinating to me that no one ever seems to say, “I just KNEW that was going to happen!” about anything good. The statement is almost always attributed to failure.

The only illusion is that we can control our entire lives. We can try, but the result is a white-knuckle ride that almost always ends badly. Control is a result of our ego needing to be right, not living in the flow of life. We can use metaphysical principles to have a better life, but we cannot exercise complete control of the conditions around us.

What we can control is our reaction to conditions. We get to decide what we are going to think. No one else can take away that right without our permission. And to control our reactions we have to ask ourselves the question, “Do I want to be right, or do I want to be happy?” And, no, the answer is not to sit there and whine that you want both.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

You're Gonna Get a Pimple

(Was originally released March 23, 2012, but didn't get posted)

I am alternately amused, annoyed and perplexed at how much I, and others around me, can fuss about the most insignificant things. I remember a discussion not too long ago about what color to paint a room in our home. That decision was preceded by high-level negotiations about the necessity of a wall border, and ultimately which border to choose since he had to have his way about having one – oops, “someone” apparently still has some energy on that! The scene entertained the staff at the wallpaper store (they actually asked us to come back the following week), though I considered seeking a peace accord from NATO.

My standard comment to someone who bumps me with their grocery cart or walks in front of me is, “No worries. Compared to world peace, how important is it?” But when it came to that room, the color of the paint and that darn wall border, I had to at least have my way in something. Or perhaps it would be more correct to say my ego needed it.

Life is about perspective. I can assure you that as I sat in my father’s hospital room this week the last thing on my mind was the weeding and cleanup I need to do on what will become our meditation shade garden. I was focused on my father’s issues, not mine. Though the chores still need doing (Pennsylvania Dutch grammar for those of you not here locally), I’m not going to get a pimple over it.

That saying comes from a friend of mine years ago who would listen quietly as I ranted and raved about the “issue du jour” and, when I was done, draw slowly on her cigarette and say, in her raspy voice while shaking her cigarette and ashes in my direction, “You’re gonna get a pimple. Uh-huh….you are.” Then she’d go back to drinking her Tuaca* (straight up, of course, no ice) and smoking while nodding her head knowingly. I hated it when she did that. It also annoyed me that she was right. My issues were normally pretty stupid to be all hot and bothered about. But I was 25 years old, and everything was an issue!

The next time you are faced with a situation that annoys you, whether it’s the actions of someone else, a world event or your own foibles, stop and ask yourself one question: “How important will this be in five years?” Our egos will insist on us being right and getting our way, but at what cost? Is it really all that important? Will worrying, fretting and getting angry solve anything?

Stop, take a deep breath and take stock of what is really important in your life. We’ve all heard the counsel “Don’t sweat the small stuff.” Here’s a news flash: In the grand scheme of things, it’s all small stuff.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

*Tuaca – I know someone will ask…It’s a citrus, vanilla liqueur that looks a little like old motor oil and tastes a lot like battery acid. It’s to be sipped, not slammed. Trust me on this.

Shedding

I would stop writing about our cats every week, but they are just such darn good teachers! The issue this week seems to be shedding. The lint roller is working overtime because it’s not a good idea to leave our house without attending to the cat hair.

It’s just that time of year. If you have pets you probably deal with shedding. It’s another sign of spring but neither fragrant as the hyacinths nor as beautiful as the crocuses. The cats’ winter coats are no longer useful or needed, so their bodies are relieving them of the additional layer of fur.

How easy is that? They no longer need the additional weight and just let it go. How would it be if our burdens were released as easily and without a second thought? Our ego minds might immediately jump to the defense of keeping drama and difficulty in our lives by telling us that our issues are far more complicated than a natural process like shedding. But are they?

That argument begs the discussion of just how complicated we want our lives to be. Ernest Holmes said that our problems are as real as we need them to be. We can ask ourselves: How hard do I want life to be? How much do I want to struggle with issues? What hoops do I insist on jumping through when it is not required?

The questions I like to pose to myself when I feel I must do something are: What would happen if I didn’t do it? Would the world stop? Would my family despise me? Would I even remember the drama five years from now?

I’m posing a lot of questions this week for which I offer no answers. Each of us must individually decide what battles we will fight and which ones we choose to walk away from. Life offers challenges. How much struggle we experience is up to us.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Human Rights

I am writing my blog this week from New York City, where I am one of five adults acting as chaperons for 37 youth from Carlisle High School. We are here at the New York Hilton and United Nations for the National High School Model United Nations conference. Just us and over 3,000 teenagers from all over the world!

I’ve been told that some of the resolutions passed here at the mock U.N. over the years have been sent on to the actual United Nations – and that some of the ideas have been adopted. Our keynote speaker last night for the Opening Session was Shula Koenig, founder of the People’s Movement for Human Rights Learning (PDHRE) and a recipient of the 2003 United Nations Prize in the Field of Human Rights, an award given to five people every five years since 1966. Often when we speak of “human rights” we package the discussion as a political, economic, social or cultural issue.

Ms. Koenig says it is none of those. Human rights are human rights – period. As a culture we enact laws, policies and regulations to protect those rights, but the rights of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness that we claim to hold so dear in our country should not be up for debate or discussion.

Few of us are in a position to impact a large number of people as is Ms. Koenig. She has spoken to people of all socioeconomic levels in more than 60 countries. She is 82 years old and I describe her as a saucy, German grandmother who shoots from the hip. Her clarity and passion for equality are intoxicating.

Just because we may not regularly speak to large groups of people doesn’t mean we are powerless to affect change. Every day we each come into contact with situations in which the rights of people around us are being violated. We can offer small gestures that have a great impact on those people whose hopes, dreams and goals are suppressed.

We can help to educate those individuals who appear to be victims by assisting them to see other options for life. Our teachings about thinking positively and relying on Universal support can go a long way if we are walking the walk ourselves, not just talking the talk. We don’t need to laugh at jokes that are “funny” at the expense of others due to race, color, sexual or gender orientation, or those physically or mentally challenged – and we certainly don’t have to forward them to our friends and family!

Open a door for a stranger. Offer to help someone elderly get an item off a high shelf at the grocery store. Approach a homeless person, instead of averting your eyes, and offer to buy them a meal. Lead by example. There will be no fanfare, ticker tape parade or award ceremony. There will, however, be a shift in consciousness, one person at a time, to support everyone around you to be more loving, more forgiving and more understanding of our human conditions.

Having rights as human beings is not an option. Doing something about supporting the rights of others instead of complaining about inequality is a choice. Choosing to support others requires courage, consistency and determination. I know you are up to the task. Now – go change the world…one person at a time!

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

Relentless Positive Action

Just a few weeks ago I heard the term “relentless positive action.” Positive action I get. I have been practicing living a more forward moving, positively enforced life for over two decades. I teach this to my congregations and clients. But “relentless?”

At the risk of making this another “cat blog” I must use our oldest cat, Dillon, as our model of Principle in Action this week. Dillon loves to drape himself over you and then fall fast asleep. He’s not particular about whether it’s your thigh while you are sitting watching TV, over your head and shoulders while perched above you on a high backed chair, or on your arm as you are trying to use your computer mouse.

He just needs to be near us. It really doesn’t matter what our agenda is. Having food on your lap, reading a book or making notes for a future talk is of no consequence. He intends to occupy the space he desires. Your sandwich, your book or your notepad are not simply irrelevant; they don’t even fit into the equation. His sweet face and sad eyes will get you every time if you attempt to push him away.

He is relentless, positive action in motion. The needs or desires of other creatures don’t register on his radar. He is being driven by instincts that compel him to fulfill his immediate need regardless of the consequences. As human beings we don’t have that luxury if we are to operate harmoniously in society.

Those who are not relentless in their pursuit of happiness and fulfillment in life are stopped by the smallest inconvenience. What’s keeping me from the gym today? Who’s stopping me from taking more candy off the grocery list? Which project needs so much attention that I can’t find fifteen minutes to do my yoga routine? If we need an excuse to get off course, we’ll find one.

So how do we move forward, relentless in our pursuit of our vision in a positive manner without bulldozing over everything and everyone in our way? Balance and intention hold the key. Spirit doesn’t fulfill our desires at the expense of people around us. We also need to make sure that the company we keep is supportive of our hopes, dreams, goals and vision.

Relentless positive action also means we re-evaluate our course frequently, making the corrections necessary to achieve our goals. We learn to compromise in the process, yet hold fast to our integrity and moral values that make us who we are. We strive to align ourselves with like-minded people who support our life journey and have a vision that we can similarly support. This week strive to be relentless in the positive forward motion of your life vision and goals!

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

A Good Scratch

After dinner the other night one of our four cats, Squeekers, was finally given the attention he so consistently demanded throughout the meal. Leaping up onto a convenient lap he enjoyed getting his nose scratched. He closed his eyes (I swear he was smiling) and to all appearances seemed to have completely tuned out the world around him.

When was the last time you felt that content, that satisfied and that fulfilled? Hopefully you can recount numerous occasions in the past week, but sadly many of us cannot. We can get so caught up in the “busy-ness” of life that we forget to enjoy those brief yet ultimately satisfying moments.

It is far too easy to complain about all the time we do not have. Thanks to 24-hour news channels and smart phones we are subjected to information overload. We are not victims of technology; we choose to be willing volunteers for this electronic abuse. Have you considered taking a break from it?

Leaving on a two-week vacation may not be possible for you this week or even in the foreseeable future. But taking a bit of time, even a minute, just for yourself is most definitely something you can do. The next time you make yourself a cup of coffee or tea take a minute (just 60 seconds), sit down and enjoy the aroma and warmth. Lie down on the couch and have a five-minute nap. This seemingly insignificant amount of time can do wonders to rejuvenate you.

I threw caution to the wind last week and treated myself to a soothing bath by candlelight. I even closed the door to the bathroom! I neglected, however, to see one of the cats, Lucy, between the shower curtains on the tub ledge before easing into the hot, soapy water. Knowing that God is always in charge, I found the purring was a wonderful addition to my meditation.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

The Prism of Your Soul

Human beings are multi-faceted creatures. To make situations easier we frequently place each other into convenient categories. All too often these labels fall far short of describing who we are as individuals.

Psychologist Dr. Dan Gottlieb reported working with a young woman who told him: “I feel like my soul is a prism, but everybody just sees one color. Nobody sees the prism.”

What would it be like if we could actually see the prism of the soul of other people around us? How would our lives be different if we allowed those we love to see all spectrums of who we are?

Think about meeting someone for the first time. Do we ask what their hopes and dreams are for the future? Do we inquire about their deepest fears or greatest joys? No. Usually we want to know if they are married or single; gay or straight; what political party they support; where they went to school; what they do for a living; what kind of car they drive; and, what socioeconomic status they have achieved.

Then, armed with the information, we use a mental check list to arrive at our decision about how to label the poor sod. Judgment, prejudice and bias are often attached to labels. We see only one color, not the full spectrum of visible light or the thousands of shades and tints of their brilliance.

The prism of our soul is all the colors or nuances of our personality that make up who we are. Add to that all the bands of light invisible to the naked eye, both above and below our spectrum of recognition. These unseen energies represent the subconscious or subjective aspects of our personalities; some perhaps not even known to us let alone anyone else.

Be willing to take a step or two back this week from your preconceived ideas about the people in your life. What positive qualities do they possess that you may have overlooked? Then, open up to others fully and confidently in being all you can be by showing a willingness to share your hidden colors with them as well.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

That's NOT What I Said!

Something that has angered me in the past was having my words twisted by someone else. It’s even worse when those words become a rumor that gets everyone’s panties in a bunch for no good reason. Not so long ago a situation like that would have brought up feelings of frustration due to a need to defend myself about something I didn’t do in the first place.

This kind of a situation has happened recently to me, but then you might have already guessed that from the title of this blog. Instead of allowing the circumstances to involve me in the drama I have remembered two helpful ways of moving through this kind of annoyance.

The first is a quote from a dear friend of mine. When this sort of thing happens to her she tells people the following: “I neither defend, justify, nor explain my actions. I let the results speak for themselves.”

This is the perfect response to give to someone who twists the facts to suit his or her own agenda at the expense of someone else’s reputation. That kind of attack usually develops out of fear, insecurity and vindictiveness. If we are quick to defend our integrity it only feeds the fire of disinformation and criticism.

The second thing I remembered was what a blessing it is to have someone who is that vehemently opposed to me personally! My ministry has the potential of increasing exponentially in the near future. If that opportunity is afforded me and if I choose to accept it, the change to my life would be significant. To say I don’t have some very human emotions about this prospect would be erroneous. I just didn’t know my reservations were so pronounced that it would show up in someone else so spectacularly!

Our lives are the direct reflection of our consciousness. If we are experiencing resistance outside ourselves to anything we are about to undertake then that conflict must be at least partially due to our subjective or subconscious concerns. Believing this, I’ve spent the past month digging deeply to understand why this person has chosen to stir up all sorts of unnecessary nonsense in my life and in that of so many other people.

Fortunately, I’ve come to some fascinating conclusions – the most impactful being that this is far less about me and very much about the other person’s issues. It has taught me, once again, to speak with clarity, act in integrity and allow Divine Right Action to unfold without attachment to the outcome. Like a thunderstorm, this too shall pass. The great thing is, I know that above the clouds the sun is shining brightly. In the meantime, the sound of rain has always been a comfort to me.

I am Diagonally Parked in a Parallel Universe

I grew up, like a lot of my friends, not really feeling at all like I belonged where I was. My trailer park roots are not something of which I am ashamed, but mother always said that I must have been mixed up at St. Francis Hospital in Dayton, OH, with a missing baby from the Rockefeller family. My champagne tastes on a beer budget have gotten me in a financial pickle more than once.

But that’s not exactly what I am talking about. Sometimes when we don’t feel like we fit in it’s because we really don’t fit in. That’s not to say we are better than those around us, but we may very well be different. It’s as if we are trying to park diagonally when everyone else is parking parallel. We tend to stand out.

While our school systems would like us to believe that we are educating free-thinkers, the teachers who allow students to think outside the box are few and far between. Today many educators are more concerned with test scores and measurements than they are with teaching our young people how to reason or think creatively. When a child does not conform to the norms of the school or society she or he can be set apart as undesirable.

We must each decide how much we wish to fit in without jeopardizing our individuality. At the same time we can be more loving in how much latitude we give to those around us in how they choose to express their individuality. Just because we are different than those around us, or around those who are just different from us, doesn’t mean we or they are wrong. Neither should it require anything more than a change of outlook. It means each of us is uniquely qualified to express life in a way that no one else can. That is something to be celebrated, not repressed.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

FEAR

F.E.A.R.

Fear stops many of us from living life to the fullest. Much of the trepidation around changes of any kind in our lives stems from a foundation of fear. We often deal with situations in our lives, yet we worry about the outcome.

Ernest Holmes wrote that the word “fear” is an acronym for “False Evidence Appearing Real.” One of the ways we can see how this shows up is when we are faced with the challenge of telling someone something we are confident is going to upset them. Whether it is the process of getting up the courage to let a friend know we have failed to follow through, or telling our mother we broke her favorite vase, our mind chatter can create numerous scenarios of the outcome – none of which are in our favor.

Once we follow through with approaching the situation with the other person, however, we may find the response quite different. Over the Christmas holidays I accidently knocked into a cabinet in the kitchen causing a ceramic cup to go crashing to the floor. I assumed it was a family heirloom – other things on the shelves were – and spent the good part of the day fretting because I thought I had to inform my partner when he got home from work that I had shattered a precious possession of his departed mother.

Imagine my shock when he laughed and told me the cup was purchased only a few weeks before when we had been out antiquing! He said he paid less than two dollars for it. For this I anguished all afternoon?!?

If we place ourselves in dangerous situations then a little well-placed, rational fear is probably appropriate. Our bodies have the ability to release the appropriate chemicals when it is necessary for us to react more quickly than normally. Seldom, however, is this required on a daily basis in the lives of most of us.

The next time fear of challenge or change appears in your life, take a moment to approach it with childlike wonderment and excitement. Yes, taking responsibility and facing challenges can be scary, but only if we allow it to be so. My friend, Marie, shared a new acronym with me for the word “fear”: Feeling Excited And Ready!

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry

The Leopard's Spots

I was recently in a discussion with someone who could not have been further away from my way of thinking if he tried. Actually, he did try and probably moved another few feet away, but I digress.

My friend was so recalcitrant in his beliefs that we ended up agreeing to disagree. It was then that he said, “You know a leopard can’t change his spots.” I suppose not, I thought.

Then I thought again. He’s not a leopard. He’s a walking, talking, breathing, sentient being that can analyze a situation and make a judgment call. He can weigh different sides of an issue at any given time and determine his stand, which could be different today than it was last week.

My friend probably can’t change the color of his hair (his spots) without chemical assistance, but he can change his thinking. We all can. But, as Einstein said, we cannot continue to think the same thoughts and expect different results.

He believes differently than I do. He believes he’s a product of his genetic background and family history. I think that’s a cop out and excuse for bad behavior, but that’s my judgment of him, not necessarily the truth. I also admit my judgment is heavily colored by the fact that he disagrees with me, which with him I find quite annoying!

When I admitted that fact it caused me to look at my own “spots.” I can’t change anyone’s thinking except my own. Instead of thinking of all the ways I could change his thinking (that would, of course, benefit him immensely, alter his life and make him a more pleasant companion in my mind), I decided to change my opinion about him. He’s perfectly fine the way he is. There’s nothing to change, except my attitude.

Part of that attitude means I don’t pity him when things go wrong for him due to his belief system or buy into his idea that the world is a horrible place where everyone is out to get him. I can empathize without sympathizing. I can also be the friend for him that I want him to be for me.

If you have someone in your life like my friend, be kind to them. Instead of criticizing them for their differences, embrace their individuality, love them and find all the good in them that you can.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Terry