Tuesday, July 08, 2014
Is it good, but still not right?
“So, how are you?” you are asked, to which you answer, “Good! I’m good!” Then it happens. The person raises an eyebrow, perhaps smirks ever so slightly and asks, “Then why don’t you look/sound like it?”
I hate to be busted. I’d like to think I can keep my emotions to myself, but the truth is I’m not nearly as good at hiding my feelings when I’m upset or angry about something. I was serving on a board one time and in the middle of the discussion another board member said, “Terry hasn’t said anything yet. I want to know what he thinks, because it’s been my experience that it’s not when he’s talking that I need to worry, but when he’s quiet.”
What’s going on with us when our life is seemingly okay on the surface, but something still seems amiss? It’s a puzzling situation. We can’t put our finger on what’s eating at us, but we’re well-aware of something being “off.” For me, it feels like the ground is going to fall out from under me, or the world around me is going to explode, or some little gnarly critter is nibbling at me in an unrelenting manner. Whatever it may be in your experience, it’s unpleasant and stops us from being truly happy.
If everything's “alright” but something still feels wrong, then things aren’t nearly as right as we’ve convinced ourselves to believe. It reminds me of two ministers I know discussing their respective relationships. The one was going into extensive details about his marriage, defending all the reasons why he was in and should stay in his relationship. When he paused, the other said very gently, “It sounds like you have what I call a “good enough” marriage.”
The question we can all consider is, Do we want to be in a good enough marriage, job, house, or any other situation? Don’t we, each and every one of us, deserve to have an amazing life worth living? I’m talking about a lie that so excites us that we just can’t imagine how today can be so amazing, yet we know tomorrow is going to be even better. We live in a user-friendly universe, designed and created to support us in all sectors of our lives. So why would anyone settle for less than s/he deserves?
I hope you are as uncomfortable reading this as I am writing this. Understand, please, that I’m being sadistic. I bring this subject up because I know that addressing the problem in your own life can create the atmosphere for the discussion, decision and motivation necessary for change. I’m not suggesting you quit your job, leave your spouse or move across country later this week. I am suggesting, however, that the next time you feel like you’ve settled for a good enough anything that you make sure you are really happy in doing so. Being content is not the same as settling. A sense of calm contentedness has its foundation in an empowered life. But if we settle in our present situation while at the same time forever reaching for something to replace what we have, then we are not living in strength. We are living in spiritual poverty as victims.
None of us deserve to be victims. You have within you the power to create the life you desire. No matter how small that power may feel, know that there is a universal power greater than any situation and you can use that power to affect change in your life. If I can be of any assistance in that regard, please let me know!
In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,