Forgive me for no blog or message last week, but with the
Unity of Harrisburg 30th Anniversary it was one of several things
that just didn’t get done. Then this week catch up was more than I expected.
Knowing, however, that everything before “but” is B.S., let me just leave it at
“I’m sorry” with no further explanation!
Last week, Daily Om
(http://dailyom.com) published the thoughts of
Madisyn Taylor. Taylor brings up a very interesting angle on accepting an
apology from someone: More often than not we say, “It’s alright,”
or “It’s okay,” and by saying this we are allowing, accepting, and giving
permission for the behavior to happen again. When we say “thank you” or “I
accept your apology,” we are forced to sit in our feelings rather than ignore
them.
Many of us, females particularly, have been told to put up
and shut up throughout our lives. If our sexual orientation, skin color or
cultural background is different than the norm in which we live just surviving
can be a struggle. We can become less interested in being fully-expressed and
more satisfied with not having conflict.
This ingrained belief system then shows up when someone
says, “I’m sorry.” We can feel like we didn’t have the right to be hurt or
upset. Yes, I know all the metaphysical psychobabble about how we partnered
with the other person to create the situation and blaah, blaah, blaah. We have
the right to expect integrity from others and the right to make decisions so
that unpleasant situations do not repeat. Being kind does not require us to
become a spiritual doormat.
Accepting an apology with grace puts “an end to this karmic
chain,” according to Taylor. It allows us to acknowledge to the other person
that we truly forgive them and at the same time recognizing the emotions we may
have covered up because of what happened.
The next time someone apologies to you, be aware of how you
respond. As Taylor says, “…often a simple ‘thank you’ is enough.
In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,
Terry
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