Wrap it up!

If you thought wrapping was done now since the holidays are past, think again. The end of the calendar year is tonight. This is a perfect opportunity to wrap up 2004 and look ahead to 2005.

I’m not a fan of New Year’s Resolutions. Many are made under the influence of the moment or alcohol and several are regretted before January 1st. If you are a regular gym bunny, you know the machines and bikes will be packed until the 15th of the month, then slowly taper off back to the regular attendees. Why? People often feel guilty about over indulging during the holidays and want to lose what they’ve gained. Unfortunately, a commitment of repentance from actions that are willful is frequently ineffective. When immediate results are not realized, the sinner returns to the super-sized order.

Why not take a different approach to indulgence? Living a life of compassion for ourselves should allow each of us to indulge in our desires, so long as they are not harming others. If we are committed to good health, we will not eat ourselves into obesity, neglect our workouts, work too much and sleep too little. Think about not what you “should” do, but what you “want” to do for the highest and good of yourself and all concerned.

In doing this, we make a conscious choice of living, instead of repeating for thoughts we feel are wrong. It is the difference between living an empowered life and a life of desperation.

Tonight, before the ball drops in Times Square or you raise your New Year’s toast, write down a few things you’d like to leave in 2004. That might include procrastination, guilt, hopelessness and feeling impoverished. Take those papers outside and burn them in a bowl. Thank the Universe for the support you know is yours and ring in the New Year with a clean slate.

Happy New Year!

Dr. Terry

Nothing's Perfect, Everything's Perfect

I’m having one of those days when do matter what I plan out, with ever good intention mind you, nothing seems to be working right. I find myself tongue-tied when speaking with others – and amusing situation to most people given that I seldom am without a comment on most anything. I made three attempts at stringing lights on my Christmas tree, which resulted in language most unbecoming the season. I’m attending a charity ball this evening, and I don’t feel excited.

So WHAT is my problem?!? Plans and ego, that’s what. I once heard that it’s fine to “go with the flow” but we have the obligation to choose the stream, river, lake or ocean in which we will flow. Though I had many things to do on my “list” today, I have had absolutely no focus, no purpose, other than to accomplish “stuff”.

While I was having my first cup of coffee, and fretting about all I had before me, that “still small voice” suggested I take a few minutes to meditate. Of course, I didn’t, which is why I ended up in the state I’m in. I couldn’t be bothered taking the time. Mahatma Gandhi was once quoted as saying, “I have so much to do today I must meditate two hours instead of one.” I would have been wise to recall that this morning, instead of now.

By allowing ourselves to go with the flow of the day AFTER we’ve set ourselves up to win by mediation, prayer or whatever practice we have to center ourselves, then, and only then, can perfection be made manifest in our lives. And now, with that thought in mind, I’m going to take that ten minutes I could have taken this morning. Namasté.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,
Dr. Terry

Belief

In a little over a month, young children throughout the world will go to sleep believing a benevolent, old man (or woman, in some parts of the world), will bring presents to them late in the night. Older children will be more skeptical and most adults will have long since given up any belief in such a tale.

I’m a little preoccupied with the Big Guy today since I just saw “Polar Express”, the new Tom Hanks movie by Pixar. Computer animation has come a long way since I was a teenager. By the end of the movie I was convinced that each character on the screen was a real person, even though I knew it was the voice and representation of Tom Hanks for five of the characters.

But that is what belief can do for us during a film or play. For a few minutes or hours we are transported into a world of make believe, far away from the cares of everyday life. While we can all decide for ourselves the existence of Mr. C., the concept of believing what one wants to believe is not a new idea. All great teachers have taught that it is our determination to see the end result that helps our endeavors into reality.

There are many ways to explain this phenomenon. Quantum physics teaches us that there is really one substance vibrating at different speeds; change the speed, change the substance. The metaphysical law of cause and effect tells the same story. The master metaphysician Ernest Holmes said, “Change your thinking, change your life.” Each modality holds the same message: Belief in the outcome.

One of the hardest chores we have in our daily lives is to believe something else than what we see directly in front of us. On Christmas morning, many children will be disappointed to see their new toy is not assembled. Instead of the finished prize, they will see an array of metal, screws, plastic, bolts and nuts. Their parents will see the finished product clearly from the directions and not be as discouraged with what they have in front of them. All right, so that’s a little too positive for most parents on Christmas morning, particularly if there is no Allen wrench in the house, but I did want to give them the benefit of the doubt.

The point is that belief will get us through even the most trying of times. Some men and women that have been put into solitary confinement for many years are released later in relatively good mental and physical health, even though most others may go mad after a short period of time. Why? The ones who survived had a stronger belief system. They created their own little world in their cell. It occupied their time and minds while others sat and bemoaned their plight.

Whatever your challenge is today, believe that an answer is available for you. There is only One Mind in the Universe, and you have access to all of that knowledge. Know that you know; or if you are not able to do that, at least know that whatever it is you need to know will be revealed to you at the exact time you need it.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Dr. Terry

Making Mother Smile

I frequent a very special beach on the Jersey Shore every year. It’s the only place like it in the area. While peaceful during the week, the weekends are full of crowds, many of who are not there for the beauty and uniqueness of this shoreline. A friend of mine taught me to do a garbage run before packing up to leave. We take along extra plastic bags and fill them with as much trash and litter as they can hold and then dispose of them at home.

Many people remark how nice this is and what a wonderful idea it is. We accept their kudos, but I also suggest they do the same, either on this visit or their next. But why pick up after others who obvious don’t care? It is because we do care.

If we are constantly concerned with who has done what to whom, or what someone else ought to be doing, we will become increasingly dissatisfied with life and the world. It is much easier to find fault with others, rather than look at our own lives and see where we are lacking. It does have some appealing points, though. People who engage in such a waste of time are rewarded with an attitude of arrogance, superiority and elitism. This might be appealing to some, but far from desirable to anyone concerned with the peace of our planet.

The next time you look at a cigarette butt on the sidewalk and scowl about an inconsiderate smoker, think about using the paper on the ground somewhere nearby (there will be some) and picking up the butt to throw it away. Take a large trash bag through your neighborhood once a week and collect anything that is unsightly. When neighbors notice what you are doing, enroll them to help you. Even if people think you are crazy, who cares? It does make a difference, at least to the planet. We all seem to enjoy making our mother happy. Why not take a moment and give Mother Earth a smile?

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Dr. Terry

Back from Dad's

I missed writing yesterday due to my trip across Pennsylvania to visit my 88 year old father who lives on the other side of the state. I check in with him weekly on Sundays by phone from wherever I am, but a physical visit periodically is important to both of us.

Here is a man who is nearly 90 years old, still cooks, cleans and does laundry for himself, and , uh, also drives himself to the store and doctor. I won't go into the wisdom of this latter accomplishment, but suffice it to say he's at least agreed not to drive at night anymore.

So he's fine. At least as fine as one can be with a heart that gives him difficulty, an inability to walk very fast and a body covered in skin cancers in various stages of development or healing. Seeing him live as well as he does gives me encouragement that I might hopefully have those tenacious genes to enable me to live well into my "second hundred years."

He is nearly twice my age, but as I near my next birthday I realize I have the next 50 years to completely live my life over if I choose, or continue with what works and release that which no longer serves me. That's barring any unforeseen circumstance that might cut my life short.

It is that possibility that makes it so crucial for each of us to live each day as it might be our last. If you had only one more day, one more week, one more month or one more year to live, how would tomorrow be for you? What would you want to have accomplished? What would you simply NOT put up with anymore? And finally...what is stopping you from doing what you want to do with your life right now?

My father may not have another 50 years. But I expect I will. Seeing him this weekend again reminded me not to waste one single, solitary minute of that time.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,
Dr. Terry

Why It Matters

It’s been two days since we here in the States have had the answer to the question about which man would be our President for the next four years.

I’m sure each of you have your own questions, disappointments, joys or feelings of some other kind about the results of our national, state and local elections. I know I do.

A friend in England posed one question to me: Why did Bush get re-elected? Apparently there was a poll done in the U.K. that asked citizens of almost every nation (except the U.S.A.) who they thought should be elected here in America. The result was unanimous: John Kerry. So why are our results so diametrically opposed to the rest of the world?

First of all, there hasn’t been a closer election since the beginning of the last century. It’s not like Bush won by a landslide. Not even close. So perhaps Americans as a whole are not so much different than the rest of the planet.

Whether you wanted him defeated a second time or back in office, we are all now faced with the same question: What going to happen now in my life, the life of my family, my career, my plans for retirement, or to the care I’m currently receiving as a retiree? These are all valid questions and ones that are worth exploring, because the answer depends less on George W. Bush, the Republican Party and big business interests and more on us.

Our country is far worse off in many ways than it was in 2000. There are a number of reasons for this that are far too familiar to all of us. What is better is the amount of involvement Americans now have with the political system and locally in our own communities. It would appear that the events of the last four years have caused a good number of people to take more responsibility for their own lives and the lives of their loved ones. This is a good thing.

Personally, I’m confident that people can take responsibility for their lives without the disastrous events we’ve seen in the recent past. But, history being what it is, we now have the daunting task before us to continue to place the good of planet and our global community at an even higher level. By thinking globally and acting locally, we can affect change in our own neighborhoods, towns and cities. Changing even one small part of the collective group consciousness of the planet is worth it. I’m willing to continue doing my part. Will you continue to do yours, or join in doing so on an even more conscious level?

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Dr. Terry

Blessed and Highly Favored

I walked into a business today, smiled and asked the clerk how she was. "OH! God! ISN'T it a miserable day!" I thought, Gee, I know I'm not happy about the election, but it just seemed like a normal, brisk, somewhat cloudy, eastern Pennsylvania, fall-like....uh...day. Matters were made worse for her, I'm sure, because by the time I left it had started raining quite heavily.

As I left, she said, "Isn't this just awful?!?" I looked at her and said, "Actually, I'm feeling pretty good. I was thinking about where my leather coat out today because it was so chilly, but then had a senior moment and forgot it. If I'd remembered to get my coat, the rain would have made a mess of it!"

Okay, so I'm not always Pollyanna, but I'd sure rather be a little over-the-top-too happy instead of finding a dark cloud in every blue sky like this chick was. Sheesh!

I have a standard reply when I'm asked how I am. "Blessed and highly favored." I can't take credit for that. It's something I picked up in the south when I lived in Georgia. A southern boy I knew said it was something his grandmother always said without fail. She never complained about anything. She just counted her blessings and knew she was favored by God.

I'm not saying we shouldn't recognize the problems in the world, our country, our community or our own lives. But recognizing them and spending a good deal of time lamenting them while we are unwilling to do anything about changing our situation is counterproductive. It also makes us really unpleasant to be around.

We are blessed to have the good in our lives. We are favored by a Universal Consciousness that knows only how to give. The trick is to open to that abundance and utilize it to the best of our abilities. You know the old saying, "If life gives you lemons, for heaven's sake slice one up and plop it into your Bloody Mary!" Hey, screw lemonade.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,
Dr. Terry

Adventures in Cement

It’s 58 degrees in the Lehigh Valley this morning, or at least at my home, but with the wind chill it feels like 48. Actually, to me, having just spent an hour outside repairing the sidewalk in front of my home, it feels like 28. I had to come back inside just to run my hands under warm water halfway through the project.

Do you know the difference between cement and concrete? I never did until a high school friend whose father was in construction corrected my use of the words one day. I always thought they were synonymous. I was told cement was the dry mix and concrete was the finished product.

Here in my borough, unlike anywhere else I’ve ever lived, the sidewalk, curb and driveway are the responsibility of the homeowner, not the borough. While I feel strongly that my property taxes ought to be paying for this, I remind myself that my taxes are minuscule when compared to other states. The harsh winter we had here last year and the salting of the sidewalks created quite a bit of damage. Most of that is now repaired thanks to my efforts this morning.

Have you ever worked with cement? It has to be just the right consistency to spread it, but not too watery or it won’t set up. While in its moist stages, one can easily rearrange it, smooth it and correct any glaring errors. But once set you will need a sledgehammer to correct the problem.

This is very much the way our lives can turn out. We have the ability to rearrange our thoughts for more positive endeavors before carrying them out. We can exercise the foresight to notice small flaws that over time can grow into noticeable problems. Something else I learned from my friend in construction is to measure twice and cut once. That worked when I was learning how to sew as well. It works equally well in our daily lives and our plans for the future. Taking the necessary time to be sure of the facts, even if it means a delay in the outcome, can help to insure our success.

Today, be aware of each step you take to accomplish whatever it is you are doing. How are you sitting at your computer? Are you slouched over and placing undue stress on your shoulders and back? If you have errands to run today, can you arrange your stops so that your route is circuitous, instead of a back and forth motion? If so, you’ll save time, energy, gas and cause less pollution. Better yet, can you walk to any of the stops?

My sidewalk repairs will be hardened by tomorrow and completely set up within the next 72 hours. How long will it take the thoughts you have today to take form? Once they do so, will you be happy with the outcome? If not, make a conscious choice today to prepare for the eventualities of tomorrow.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,

Dr. Terry

How's Your "Busyness"?

First, I hope each of you in the USA have or will vote today. I'm planning on a walk to my polling place to enjoy the brisk fall weather before it starts raining later. Exercise your right to vote! My Grandpa Jack never voted. Didn't want to; and, didn't intend to. So whenever he'd start complaining about politics, my Uncle Vince would say, "Jack, You don't vote, so you don't get to bitch!" Good point, dontcha think?

Now, back to why I'm writing today. I woke up pleasantly this morning, without the use of an alarm. I had a good night's sleep and was in a delightful mood. And yet, I felt a little "off". After sitting down at my desk with my coffee and getting into the day's work of computer files, documentation, phones calls and email, I felt excited and frenetic. That's why I stopped. I don't want to feel frenetic.

I want to have a calm and peaceful life, one filled with joy, love and playfulness. So why was I "feeling better" when I was actually all anxious and stressed inside?

Part of it is the answer to why so many women stay in abusive relationships: Familiarity. As humans, we like to feel comfortable, even if the situation that is making us feel comfortable is unpleasant or even dangerous. Grandma Esther used to say that the good thing about being up to your neck in horses*&t was that eventually you get used to the smell and at least it's warm. Sound familiar? There are many abused women who have reported that even though their husbands or boyfriends beat them, at least they have a home to live in. It's not right to have to put up with abuse in our lives. NEVER. But guess who is our biggest abuser? Us. Most people abuse themselves far more than they are abused by others.

My cross to break (not bear, thank you very much) this time around is that I feel I must always be doing SOMETHING, or I'm not doing my job. So, part of my healing process and growth is to do nothing and do it more often.

That's why even if you have a successful business it can easily become a stressful "busyness". The next time you feel stressed, ask yourself: "Why am I doing this?" Is it something that is a life and death situation, something you just cannot walk away from for a few minutes? The answer may surprise you.

The trick is to act on your answer, walk away, and return to whatever it is with a better attitude...or, perhaps in some cases, not at all. It's like the rest of life: It's a choice. You get to make that choice. How will you choose?

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,
Dr. Terry

To Whom Do YOU Whisper?

It's Monday, 01 November, 2004 and Fall is about fallen here in the Lehigh Valley of Pennsylvania. The peak colors were magnificant last week. I grew up in southern California, but have not lived there in over ten years. I'm not crazy about Winter, but Fall is quite incredible. It's hard to describe to people out on the coast how a row of burning bushes look as they turn from green to bright red; or the gasp you get when you round a corner and see a bright, yellow maple. Truly a marvel. As are all the leaves one must rake later in the week. My last house in Atlanta had eight trees in the front yard and they dropped from last August to March. My current home has NO trees, save the arbor vitae at the front porch. I love enjoying other people's trees...and allowing them the exercise of cleaning up!

But....there was a point to my writing today. I recently heard this quote about trees:

"If you reveal your secrets to the wind....do not blame the wind for revealing them to the trees".

To whom do YOU whisper? In my line of work, most, if not all, of what I am told by others must be held in strict confidence. But when it comes to my own life, I'm an open book. The Dalai Lama says that his assistants NEVER tell him anything sensitive, because he'll likely share it at his next news conference, interview or public appearance! He has a pure conscious and no secrets. I can't say I don't have a few secrets, but wondering where our secrets may go after they leave our lips does give one cause for pause.

Be mindful of the power of your word. Use you gift of speech only for good, to encourage others and for the healing of our planet. Then, you may cast all your secrets to the wind, knowing that they are all for publication!

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,
Dr. Terry

A New Beginning?

Well, that was interesting. I just finished typing an entire segment, my first posting to my brand new blog and then I somehow lost it. I suppose in the universal scheme of things it wasn't time for those pearls of wisdom to be disseminated to the Internet?

At any rate, tonight is Sunday, 31 October 2004. I seem to have chosen the pagan New Year's Eve of Samhain to begin this new adventure. Nothing happens by accident.

I began a spiritual journey two decades ago. It has involved much study, a few degrees and certificates along the way, but most importantly, it has meant that I have had to be brutally honest with myself. All of this had been for the purpose of creating a life worth living, a live that means something - at least to me - and that in some way living life fully can help others to do the same. At least that is my intention.

I hope in the days, weeks and perhaps years to come I will be able to share more of my journey with you, and hear about yours. It is by sharing our lives, hopes and dreams that we can gain clarity of thought and move ahead. In doing so, we can help each other as well as help to heal our planet.

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,
Dr. Terry